1. The Female always makes THE RULES.

2. THE RULES are subject to change without
notice.

3. No Male can possibly know all THE RULES.

4. If the Female even suspects the Male knows
all THE RULES, she must immediately change some
of THE RULES.

5. The Female is NEVER wrong.

6. If it appears the Female is wrong, it is
because of a flagrant misunderstanding caused by
something the Male did or said wrong.

7. If RULE #6 applies, the Male must apologize
immediately for causing the misunderstanding.

8. The Female can change her mind and THE RULES
at any time.

9. The Male must never change his mind without
the express written consent of The Female.

10. The Female has every right to be angry or
upset at any time.

11. The Male must remain calm at all times,
unless the Female wants him to be angry or
upset.

12. The Female must, under no circumstances, let
the Male know whether she wants him to be angry
or upset.

13. The Male is expected to read the mind of the
Female at all times.

14. At all times, what is important is what the
Female thought she meant, not what she actually
said.

15. If the Male doesn't abide by THE RULES, it
is because he can't take the heat, lacks
backbone, and is a wimp.

16. If the Female has PMS, all THE RULES are
null and void and the Male must cater to her
every whim.

17. Any attempt by the Male to document THE
RULES could result in bodily harm.

18. If the Male, at any time, believes he is
right, he must refer to RULE #5.